I’ve virtually been a prisoner for the last two months. No, not a prisoner of love (alas), but an inmate chez moi chained to my computer. I wish I was announcing that I’ve been madly writing the sequel to Je T’Aime, Me Neither, however, the guidebook work I was doing will help liberate me financially to do that later this year. What kind of fun can one get up to locked up at home?… Well, when you can’t go to fun, sometimes it comes to you… or to your phone…
Sundays are meant for cuddly lie-ins, leisurely brunches, strolls in the park, admiring art or sipping mimosas. This is what I was hopelessly dreaming of last Sunday while rewriting hotel entries… oh wait… weekends away – yet another thing to do on Sundays! Woe was me!! But my prison terms was almost up and I would soon be free to do all of the above again. Up early enough, I frowned at the gorgeous sunny day I couldn’t enjoy, showered and was about to buckle down to work when my phone chimed.
A Cuddly Lie-in?
Ciao peux tu me dire si tu as recu mon mail test. It was Maurizio, my flirtatious former neighbor who occasionally texted me. I checked my email, and there was the message he was wondering about. So I write back telling him I’d received it, sorry for the delay, I’d been in the shower. After clicking send I knew I should have just said yep got it! By then it was too late… I’d love to take a shower with you and ea…
Oh mon dieu! I hadn’t really expected him to be so forward after only making little hints for years now. While he is a great guy, real romance is far from my mind right now (not that that was what he seemed after anyway!!) I embarrassingly replied something about having lots of work to do and have a nice day! That didn’t calm him down, ever half hour or so I received more and more daring messages… would he just get the picture if I didn’t reply?
A Leisurely Brunch?
Attempting to get back to work writing some restaurant reviews, my phone dinged again. This time it wasn’t Maurizio. Low and behold it was the Film Guy. He still texts me now and then. Un petit brunch chez moi? He suggested. I knew what that really meant… No, I still don’t want to go all the way across town to give you a massage. I replied saying I was busy and that he should try asking in advance sometime. He sulkingly replied something along the lines he wasn’t sure if I even wanted to see him. This time I was more direct and said that unless he was looking for something more concrete than… non. That was the end of that.
A Little Art?
Tu veux faire une pose ptit verre de vin? Maurizio then tried a new tactic, getting his mouth out of the gutter, he tried to tempt me with just a glass of wine… at his place… then a movie… still non. When he wouldn’t take my nons for an answer I finally told him I was just getting out of a painful histoire and didn’t have romance on my agenda. That’s when he replied the above text: Just some pleasurable caresses and we won’t talk about love. Isn’t it your break time? Ummm NON!
A Sunday Cocktail?
Just when I was getting fed up of hearing my phone buzz, I saw that the most recent message was actually from Davide the Doctor. He was actually a leftover from the Trouver un Jules experiment. We’d connected on the last thing I tried, the Bonjour, Bonjour app. I’d actually thought he might be interesting, that was until he adeptly pulled a virtual disappearing act. We’ve actually never met in person, but he texts every so often, I really don’t see the point in this and now that I have a serious loathe for chatting stemming from my text-addicted ex. Davide had texted last week saying he’d just returned from NYC. Funny, he’d never mentioned he was going… anyway. I’d ignored that message thinking he wasn’t worth it after the long silence. Tonight’s message just said Salut! So I thought based on his insistence, he was deign to a response. We exchanged a few messages then silence. Was he ever going to ask me out? I prompted him with the photo of the cocktails to which I only received an enthusiastic comment that he’d taken up cocktail making… what about one for petite moi? I guess I’ll only get my cocktail where I first got it, the great new piano bar Club Rayé.
Sigh! This virtual Sunday was the pits. However, maybe it’s meant to get me back on the dating bandwagon. I thought I’d wait until I get back from my big trip to Asia… but the romantic spring air might be wafting my way sooner. As long as it blows the slate clean for now, I might be game!
