My heart is almost jumping out of my chest! Could it really be amor for the Mexican? Is he capable of loving just one person? Well, besides himself? What will happen with M. And E.? As always, it’s never easy with our lovestruck chico, did he survive his date?
February 20, 2010 4:16 PM
Patience is certainly not my strongest quality. But I have to tell myself, sometimes it’s necessary and the pain it creates does make me stronger in the end. Besides, I know have such vivid new images in my mind having seen my angel Juliette. Her delicate smile, her long fine hair.
But I have new challenges this time around. And decisions, yes, serious decisions. I hate decisions. Anyway maybe I won’t have to decide right away. E.’s been texting me, I finally told her that I was sick. M. just thinks the pained look on my face is depression. I guess they are sort of linked, because before I connected with Juliette. I was trying to get to the bottom of why I was so attracted to her and now I think I understand. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
We met for a coffee yesterday. Seeing her come into the cafe I was in awe, I couldn’t even get out of my chair. She sat down across from me. I stared. She stared back, then she smiled. I think we must have sat there silently for, 5 maybe even 10 minutes, the silence broken by the waiter. I ordered a café crème and she nodded to confirm one for herself too. That’s when I remember that maybe she couldn’t speak. I was caught off guard. Our cafés arrived. We took slow sips and smiled at each other. I opened my mouth to speak, but found myself . . . speechless.
Another 15-20 mins went by with us just smiling shyly at each other. Rays of sunlight emerged through the grey Paris sky, casting a golden glow on her face. she squinted and smiled. It was then that I really understood the connection we had. She didn’t need to speak, it was like I could read her thoughts, or because she couldn’t talk that she exuded everything she needed to communicate in other ways, through her aura.
We left after about an hour, I don’t think I had even open my mouth since the waiter had come to the table. We stood outside the café and I mimed “I’ll call you?” and she replied with a gesture, “text me” I kissed her on the cheeks and off she went. I was helpless. This whole situation is throwing me completely out of whack. It’s like I’ve forgotten how to be myself. But maybe that’s not a bad thing?